UPDATED with a challenge ;) Culture: make your own – no not yogurt – and quit letting 2 people define culture rot

Can’t speak for anyone else but I think this needs to be said:

What matters to you, your kids, your life, your happiness, your satisfaction happens right there within your family. Turn off the t.v. if it offends you (duh?) If you object to the lousy role models you see on t.v. then FIND OTHER ROLE MODELS. It’s not difficult. If you can’t find a grandparent, teacher, coach, volunteer, or other excellent role model in your day to day life, there are MILLIONS of them in the US alone.

AT COLLEGES & UNIVERSITIES

There are 4,495 Title IV eligible degree granting institutions of higher education in the US and 14.6 MILLION full time college students. Fourteen point six million people pursuing higher education and you’re focused on a music awards show. YOU ARE AN IDIOT. Regardless of your “margin of error” 2 people vs 14.6 MILLION isn’t statistically significant.

AT LIBRARIES

Ok, degree granting institutions are too intimidating for you or too far away? There are one hundred nineteen THOUSAND nine hundred eighty-seven (yes, 119,987) LIBRARIES in the united states.

AT MUSEUMS

You say you don’t want to read a book, look at a magazine, thumb through the paper, borrow a movie, listen to an audio book to absorb the single most wonderful miracle in the entirety of humanity: human & the pursuit of knowledge? Fine. Go to a museum & absorb it there.

There are 17,500 museums in the United States.

The US is composed of about 3.794 million square miles.

And the average licensed driver in the US drives 13,476 miles per year.

So every year with your car, you’re covering enough distance to encompass 15,858 full time college students, 15 degree-granting institutions, 426 libraries and 62 museums. And you’re focused on 2 idiots on an awards show as representing our “culture rot”?

I’m willing to bet the people who are sharing the 2 idiots – whether positive or negative – on Facebook haven’t spent as much time at museums, libraries, or universities COMBINED in the past year as they’ve spent complaining about those 2 idiots.

It’s marketing … and not only is it working … it’s making you its slave. Who’s the idiot? You or them?

P.S. if you can find 5 people who posted a photo of or the names of those 2 examples of “culture rot” in the past 4 days AND have also been to a Library, Museum AND University (for the pursuit of new knowledge, not for alcohol, drugs, standardized tests, or athletic events) in the past year – I will read a piece of Victorian Era literature or one of its American contemporaries (which I loathe as much as the whigners loathe the 2 examples of culture rot). So bring it on – prove to me you’re not a bunch of uncultured whigners and I’ll be lady enough to read Brontë or Austen or Tennyson. One piece of Victorian literature per five “found” exhortants of culture rot who’ve been to a museum, library AND University in the pursuit of knowledge in the past year (yes, online universities count)

you don’t always have to be right …

so that’s why this is here and not on Facebook – because I don’t have to be right about it, but it gave me a point that I wanted to make and sometimes that’s ok … I’m not making anyone read it, and from time to time my furry little brain needs to write about something that’s not quite so structured as academic writing so when something sparks, I try to see if it’ll go anywhere …

ran into a “well that makes as much sense as a raincoat on a frog” post the other day from one of my favorite business sites the other night – Inc. Magazine’s Facebook Page

(and before I go any further, I whole-heartedly agree with Mr. Seth Godin … he’s absolutely correct “You are not your resume, you are not your work” … 40 hours of your week doesn’t have to define who/what/how/why you are the other 128; we’re all dynamic and interesting, versatile and adaptable, human beings and we have the tremendous blessing of living in a free country …

Photo with a quote shown here.

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and if Inc. Magazine had just left it at that, it would have been beautiful – a perfect Thursday afternoon nudge in the subconscious presented in an unpretentious yet provocative manner (thought provoking you nut, not Madonna or Sinead O’Connor provocateur)

But they didn’t. They added to their description of the photo that Seth Godin is a marketing guru.

Which tells me they entirely missed the point of Mr. Godin’s quote. Which is a shame

According to the quote, Mr. Godin is a genius who understands the human creature on a level that few of us can contemplate.

According to Inc. Magazine, we should probably wear tinfoil hats when he’s around because he might use that genius for something other than thought provoking one-liners about the construct of self …

 

Don’t stop for coffee at the golden arches …

When I’m an old lady, there will be no 25 cent Senior Coffee for me …

those assnuggets at McDonald’s don’t have pink (sweet n low) or green (truvia) – just Yellow Heartburn & Migraine (spelnda) or Blue Heartburn & Migraine (equal) or Clear Fat-Ass (liquid sugar).

This is what I get for not wanting to spend $5 at Starbucks for a non-fat 3x latte LOL (or for driving 500ish miles in one day at the end of finals week)

First Job After Graduation ….

My counter-points follow … (yes, originally written back in July, I didn’t post them here then)
From Pinterest

From Pinterest

Your article today was great for the traditional student. For a non-traditional student who worked her way through college & grad school – and ultimately has 15 years of professional experience (and probably a family) by the time she has a masters degree and is applying for a PhD program – the “first job out of college” is also likely the job that got her through to graduation and there are some very challenging loyalty land-mines awaiting her.
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1. This job probably helped you with tuition assistance – if you start looking you know that you’ll have to pay back that tuition assistance – and the company knows that, so finishing your masters might not be worth nearly as much as it would be to another organization BUT that other organization is going to have to give you a signing bonus of about $15K to cover the tuition assistance AND the taxes on it (since tuition assistance programs are, if written & administered correctly, tax free benefits to employees unless they depart before it’s paid back).
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2. After investing so much time, energy, and money into a career and its accompanying education, if you decide you’re not going to spend the rest of your professional life doing what you’ve just finished educating yourself to do you’re in a Catch-22: starting over in a new field can be a costly proposition, but 15 years of experience might not be enough to become a consultant. Writing your resume will be a challenge.
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3. The classic Nice Girls Don’t Get the Corner Office and Play Like a Man, Win Like a Woman advice applies: if you’ve been with an organization long enough to get through grad school, chances are you’ve
(a) been pigeon-holed – which may limit your advancement and/or may have caused someone above you to get in the unprofessional, but real, habit of treating you like a kid because, despite being in your early 30’s, they think of you as a student
(b) been auditioning as a “professional” every day – which means that those mornings when you weren’t on your game because you were up all night writing a paper OR with a sick child OR with a far away family member in need of a shoulder, your boss (and all your colleagues) noticed that you weren’t on your game and – because it’s business, not personal – they don’t care WHY, they just care that you are.
(c) in a multi-generational office, exceeded the educational attainment of anyone who didn’t have to pay their dues in a lousy economy – which digs up the education + experience vs experience squared work-place conundrum
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4. If you used student loans to achieve your academic goals, you’re suddenly taking home a lot less money unless you got a $12K/year raise – but you’re still responsible for maintaining a professional appearance
5. If grad school created a significant change in your weight, you need to get the weight back off while maintaining a wardrobe that fits & is professional, without showing up at work looking like you just ran out of the gym every morning.
6. Colleagues will assume – erroneously – that now that you’re done with school, you have an over-abundance of free-time. This is false – that free-time is now going to be dedicated to the things you put off while in school – the gym, a tidy home, hobbies, getting more than 3 hours of sleep per night, etc.
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7. The new skills you attained while achieving a state-of-the-art education won’t be appreciated by those whose education ended the year Nixon & Ford served as POTUS. These people are (a) old enough to be your parents, (b) above you in the food chain, (c) not going to retire for another 5-12 years. This will be a challenge to your ongoing professionalism.
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8. If you look for something new after finishing grad school while working somewhere, you will face the awkward question “why are you leaving your current position”. It’s egregiously unprofessional to say “just because”. It’s fruitless to say “because I wanted to see what the market had to offer now that the economy has recovered”. If you were only at the position for long enough to finish your education, prospective employers are going to know that you used the benefits package as a spring-board to achieving a goal, and this creates some questions about your character. If, while working through school, you relocated – whether because of family, academic or economic reasons – the question is further complicated.
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9. The questions you get asked in interviews will make you realize that you’re the only person in the room who has been balancing school and a profession in the recent past – “Tell us a time when you exceeded all expectations” isn’t a question that’s begging for “well I worked full time while raising a family and maintaining a 3.85 GPA for the past X years to achieve my goals” … partly because you have no idea what the GPAs of the interviewers were, and partly because they want to know about your professionalism, not your sleep deprivation.
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10. If you managed to work full-time while being in school full-time and having a family, chances are you finished your academic work at least partly online – and you’re not in your early 20’s. There is still a pall cast upon non-traditional students and online programs by those who feel that college should be (or is) a 4 year residential season of your life between the ages of 18 and 22. You’ll need to find someone above you in the food chain at your employer who completed the same program, from the same university, to mentor you through the slalom of being a new-graduate with more than a decade of experience.
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An Open Letter to Cable One

Dear Cable One,

Please reform your corporate culture to stop saying “eff you” to people who choose to dwell in the beauty & splendor of rural areas.

Please stop trying to tell me it’s my modem (we’ve changed that EIGHT times).

Please stop telling me I need a service call you’ve checked the wiring THREE TIMES IN 58 WEEKS (GTFO I’m starting to think y’all are Jasper & Horace from 101 Dalmatians and that you’re going to give my dog to Cruella Deville to make a GSD Coat).

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE teach your local techs that GRADUATE SCHOOL is not code for the state pen – I REALLY am in graduate school. I really DO have homework to do and because of you and your inability to conceive that anyone would use their internet connection for anything other than pr0n or pirating music, MY academic life is being affected.

Last night during a 45 minute conference with 3 classmates about the status and needs of our EPA Proposal to reduce the waste of the publishing industry, my connection dropped SIX TIMES. When my other half called to complain the tech noticed that the modem had cycled TEN TIMES in that 45 minute window. and then offered us a service call. GET OUT OF MY HOUSE AND FIX THE INFRASTRUCTURE. WE PAY YOU FOR SERVICE. WE PAY YOU FOR INSURANCE ON THE SERVICE AND YET IT SUCKS AND YOU’RE NOT EVEN APOLOGETIC ABOUT IT.

Thank you for not giving a damn about education, the environment, or the fact that you’re creeping me OUT with the # of times y’all want to come to my house & tell me nothing’s wrong with the wiring. If you want to try my cooking, pay your donation like everyone else and go to the Soup Fest at the church and get it there.

XO,

The Kitchen Witch, English Grad Student, AccountantMom